Opinions are like....

Opinions are like arseholes. Everyone has one.

Here is something that has been troubling me lately. People have opinions and express these.  Which I fully support their right to do so. However, if I disagree with said opinion, they take, as we say in Belfast, "the nick."

Here is my opinion on that. 

If you have an opinion, viewpoint or belief. Be prepared to back it up or defend it. If you want to share your opinion expect that others will disagree and exercise their right to express this. I have witnessed lately a lot of people state opinions, be unable to defend these opinions and therefore "take the nick."

I am full of opinions.  They are mine and I am fully prepared for others to disagree.  I love nothing more that a good debate and I will admit defeat if my opponent successfully refutes my argument.  I generally try to see both sides of the argument and therefore am unlikely to "take the nick" if someone disagrees with me, as generally I don't care.

Recently, I have experienced, via the magical medium of social media, the loss of an online friendship.  Someone, an educated woman in her 30's, took umbridge when I made an observation relating to an occupation a member of her family was in.  Several, members of my family are in the same occupation and it was not a direct or indirect slight on anyone who may have this type of employment.  I simply made an observation and made a comment that the behavior I witnessed was disappointing.  This apparently was offensive and I was swiftly deleted.  To be honest, the loss of this persons online presence is hardly going to cause me any sleepless nights.  We had met only a handful of times through a mutual friend, and as the done thing these days, we "friended" each other.  I had no feelings, on this girl at all.  The only time I would even think of her was when some snippet of life related trivia popped up on my newsfeed.  So why have I put so much thought into this seemingly irrelevant person?

As, I say.  Opinions are like arseholes.  We all have one and you have to be prepared to watch your own.

The reason why this seems to have bothered me so much is not the loss of this "friendship" but the lack of debate.  Instead of defending her position, she deleted me,  Ran from confrontation by throwing the word "offended" in.  This seems to be on the rise.  I have noted this phenomenon a lot recently.  Freedom of speech impeded by the "offended"  seems to be that this is a generation of lethargic and 

Lazy thinkers. I note this phenomenon particularly amongst the devoutly religious.  It is completely out of order to criticise their belief system yet par for the course that a belief I hold dear, LGBT equality rights for exanple, can be brushed aside and openly criticised. Again when views are challenged. The automatic go to is "offensive" contrary to belief systems etc. 

I am certainly not the first to blog about this particular phenomenon and neither will I have explored this topic in the most articulate way.  It is just something I have been musing on lately.

I have a feeling even this blog will cause offense and probably the loss of more precious online friendships, however in the interests of being brave. I don't care. I recently turned 30 & the freedom this affords is amazing. Gone is the self doubt or self conciousness of my 20's. 

Offense is offense, but back up your argument. Who knows. Maybe you could teach me something.

Have to start somewhere

I have absolutely no idea what I am doing.

I have never written before and I certainly have no experience of layouts or designing blogs.  In fact I named this blog "Not sure yet" and I have no idea how to change that.  I haven't got a snappy screen name or any vintage pics to post in the header.  A truly unsuccessful first outing.

What I do have is a lot of thoughts.  Like a lot.  Usually they come tumbling out of my mouth in no sort of order at all, confusing and infuriating anyone who is unfortunate enough to get caught in the stream.

I like a lot of things and I have thoughts on a lot of things, but I don't seem to have the attention span to become obsessed in the way other people become obsessed with things.  I worked in make-up for a few years and I loved it but never as much as others loved it.  Any TV shows, films or books I love, I never love as much as others.  I think that sort of sums me up.  I have always been sort of stuck in the middle.  In many ways.

I am what you would call a larger lady.  Not huge, but bigger.  I usually swing between a 16-18.  Before my recent wedding I was a size 14.  No mean feat let me tell you, but here I am two months later a stone and a half heavier and back to a size 16-18.  This is average these days.

Even my wedding.  I was 29 when I got married.  About average these days.

My grades in school were above average granted, but that didn't transfer over to Uni.  I got lost if truth be told and I didn't finish.  Now I have an average job with an average wage.

I am not running myself down with this.  I am simply stating fact.

It is something I have came to realize about myself recently and now that I am staring down the barrel of 30 (in less than 2 weeks) it is something I would like to change.  Like many people I have always thought that my future lay in writing.  I have never known what or when I would write but I have always thought I would.  Turning 30 makes you assess what you have and what you don't have.  Who you are and who you thought you would be.  I thought my 20's would be like Friends and that never happened.  I didn't make it happen.  I didn't put enough effort into any of my relationships, or my career or anything to make it like that.  I am too lazy.  Another fact I have came to accept.

The strange thing about me being completely average is this.  When I was younger I longed to be normal.  I prayed for it and did everything in my power to blend in.  It didn't work.  I have never fitted into a clique so I stopped trying.  As I have grown older I have positively rejected average.  I hate anything that is popular.  I hate chick flicks.  I hate the Grease and Dirty Dancing Megamixes.  I hate reality TV shows.  I hate mob mentality and this overwhelming trend towards "quirky" and "cutesy" and the use of slang and one word sentences. So why have I become the one thing I always wanted to be and then the one thing I positively went out of my way not to be?

What I also have, is a husband who loves me more than average.  I know that for certain.  Not many people can say that and it makes you a little stronger.  Knowing someone loves you BECAUSE of all your faults, oddities and quirks.  Mr McC would be the first to tell you that I am completely and utterly mental.  That is what he loves about me.  When you see yourself through someone else's eyes like that, you can't help but feel a little bit special.

I think that is behind my decision to start writing a blog. I don't have anything in particular to write about.  I am not obsessed with fashion or beauty.  I have an average interest.  Plus I am to lazy to get into competition with the several hundreds of thousands of bloggers who write about the "hottest new trend" or their "best beauty buy" and being nearly 30 and love by at least one wonderful man has made me OK with that.

What I am going to write about is what I think.  What I feel.  What annoys me about the world and I will give this warning right now.  I will be sarcastic.  I will be caustic and I will be irritating.

I have decided that this is my safe place to discover me.  Find my voice as a writer, finally after all these years of thinking I would eventually become one.  I am not who I thought I would be at 30.  I am alright with that.  I just want to discover who I will be if I put in a little more effort.

Even reading that last paragraph has made me annoyed at myself.  How Hannah Horvath was that?  What an incredibly self indulgent and ridiculous thing to say.  I am going to leave it in this post though.  I haven't taken enough risks yet in life and I think it is time I changed that.  I won't be sharing these posts with my friends and family just yet, but the eventual aim is I will.  Maybe someone I know will stumble across this blog by accident and make that decision for me but  one day I will be brave enough to post a link on Facebook.  Until then, I am just going to enjoy writing rubbish and taking the first steps towards being more than average.